I have got an abcess just under my wisdom tooth as a result i really can,t eat alot,it hurts like hell,but i don,t care cuz while i,m like this i can,t eat as much,yet i know it,s very dangerous for me as i have problem,s with my kidney,s [i no longer have kidneys!!] so i am barely able to eat and i,m in pain yet i know what i,m doing is stupid yet i don,t really care, i,ve suffered with food problems for such a long time now,i guess i,m getting sick of it,some days like today i just wish i could go to bed and not wake up,i know thats a selfish thing to say but right now i honestly don,t care,i,m sick of seeing all these people who say their gonna help me yet they don,t they dribble on about the same old crap,why can,t i be normal? why must i live like this? it isn,t fair to those i love and i hate seeing the pain in their eyes,i also self harm and the urge to stick a knife in my legs is very strong,i,d really welcome any advice by fellow E.D people ,people who understand but have gotten better,people who have finally beat this horrible addiction.
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