I just need some advice. Similar to alot of people on here I guess. My main ED is restricitng calories, but i swing to bulimia, and lately it's been taking over. And i feel so much worse in this cycle of my ED than when i'm restricting. I feel like i'm cracking up and I don't know what to do. I have been bingeing and sometimes not able to purge and it hurts my stomach so badly and i'm so terrified of ganinng weight. Today i b/ped 4 times and didn't get it all out, so will still have gained tomorrow. I feel like i'm teetring on the edge of an abyss, a toilet shaped abyss most likely and like i'm losing myself in amongst all of this crap. I don't want to go to my Dr and I don't want to tell anyone about this. I love my husband and i know he loves me, but we have some problems and he can be very controlling and i'm afraid if he knows about it, it will give him more control and make me worse. Does any one have any advice on how to tackle this yourself without medical or treatement centre help? I want to stop the b/ping it makes me feel so bad about myself. Hmph.
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