I don't know what to do with myself anymore! I'm so lost! I have bipolar and I'm on a down and what comes with that down is anorexia..now I cant blame it all on the down..I have totally lost control over so much...my son left for the summer to be with his dad and I have no control over what he dose from day to day because they are a state away...I'm a stay at home mom and I know that is a big job and everyone says I contribute a lot and blah blah blah but I don't feel it...I'm not bring in any money other that 500 in child support and I feel so worthless..I hate myself everyday and there is an on going daily battle in my head over my self worth..over eating and everything else that I could possibly freak over...I don't know what to do with myself anymore...If it was not for my children I swear I would have taken every last pill in my bathroom and believe me there are a lot of pills in there...I just need some support from someone other than my boyfriend who loves me and has my best interest in mind but has no idea what I'm dealing with!
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I gave my 2 week notice last Friday 13th. Now to join you fine people in a life of leisure and nothing else to do but to look out for myself....is it just me or does that sound pretty boring? My goal was to live to retire and I guess having to take early retirement because of health reasons wasn't exactly the way I had planned things. I just can't stay in that building that is reeking mildew...