Hi, this is my first post and I'm really nervous...not sure why...but just the thought of finally admitting that i have an ed is really terrifying. i don't really know how i ended up on this site, but i had a huge binge a couple of hours ago...actually it probably wasn't a huge binge at all, but to me it was - a cheese sandwich and some icecream and chocolate, and as usual i ended up purging as much of it as i could. suddenly it clicked in my head that this isn't normal, but i'm still not sure i want help. my eating habbits have always been eratic, for about the last 7 or 8 years, but they just go from one level to another. i dont know how it all started, probably just as a diet, but at the age of 10 of course i didn't realise what i was doing. it all just really got out of hand, and ever since i've always been one extreme or the other.i either starve myself, eating only 300-400 calories a day, or binging completely, then starving the next day, or binging and then purging, either through throwing up or using laxatives - at one point i was taking up to 20 a week. it has now just become an accepted part of my life, and although part of me doesn't want to stop it, the other part knows i need to, and i know this will be hard now that it has become something that controls me, rather than the other way round. now i've made this post, i'm not really sure what to do next, and am just looking for some support and advice, and to be able to talk to other similar people.
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