my therapist has been bringing up hospitalization for the last two weeks. it's "start getting healthy or else that's where you'll land yourself." i have already told her that i'll never go back. it's demoralizing and inhumane (in my opinion). but i don't know what to do. i have to gain weight when all i want to do is lose. i have to stop taking laxatives, and even though i want to-i've been unsuccesful thus far. she wanted to start seeing my twice a week, and i refused. i don't want to be forced into something i'm scared of. i've done the health thing, and was successful for a while. but i always return to my ed. i just figure there must be a reason for this. maybe it's just my own morbid curiousity to see how low i can really go....how far i can honestly push myself w/o dying. i dunno. i'm kinda frusterated over this. has anyone else ever been through anything like this?
Posts You May Be Interested In
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...