I feel strange sometimes thinking about recovering from my ED. What will I do? And that's the problem alot of the time, I have not been going out like I used to, I know b/c the way that I look, not b/c I am being good about my binge drinking, so when I get home from school at night or on the weekends I am lost if I am trying hard not to turn to food and binging. So I usually do. My life feels so strange now. I use to so strongly believe that if I could just be thin and have a rockin' bod' that life would fall into place. And I would have a man in my life that loved me more than anything(another issue that I have) But I know better than all that now, so I feel lost. Which is even scarier than or just as scary as when I started facing my ED deamond. I don't need to be so very thin, but I want a nice body, I should, I like working out. It's the food that's in my way. It seems so unfair. I feel so lost.
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