I have been having a really bad day today. I'm not really sure why i woke up and felt the way I do, but right away I was planning what i was going to binge and purge and how I was going to hide it from my boyfriend. I got out of treatment a month gao and I was doing really well, but now everything is falling apart. I can't go back to the hospital because that means that I have failed in my recovery. I sometimes feel like there is never going to be an end to this maddness. I just want to be "normal" again. I wish that people knew that I wasn't doing well, so that I would have some kind of support and I wouldn't have to keep hiding this. I'm so sad!
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