Just need to vent. I purged for the first time last night. I have had a problem with binging for several months now and have always over exercised so I would not gain any weight. I have been seeing a counselor which has helped tremendously. I have not really even had the urge to binge for a few weeks now. The only reason that I binged (which is not even a reason) was that I was bored. I ate so much that I was physically hurting, so I kept trying to purge until I suceeded. Funny, I always imagined it differently. Like magically everthing that I overate would come up. It didn't quite happen that way but I did get some relief. The point is I am disgusted that I binged in the first place. I am seeing a counselor who is giving me perfectly good advise to follow when these urges happen but when I am in the "binge zone" I just don't think. I am just so mad at myself I cannot stand it!!!
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