Oh god, I think our moms were twins seperated at birth. The thing with our moms is that they always mean the "best" by what they say and think their tough love will help- but really, it just hurts. Also, your mom is probably really hurting right now and needs therapy herself.

You are doing the right thing by removing yourself from her presence. I hope you can get a good therapist to talk it out, because I know with mine I've learned to slowly forgive my mother and try not to be so resentful towards her after all she did to me in childhood.

Take care of yourself, and focus on your own recovery and not her sharp words. /hugs

Lol mum ay cant live with thema but cant live with out them! my mum is exactly the same only ive been fourtunate to move out. although shes still there nagging. i guess what your doing is the best and looking at yourself through Gods eyes and only listening to the possitive comments. ANother thing you could try which might be kinda scary is to sit down with her and tell her how you feel about the negative comments. maybe if you havent cleaned properly she could tell you but in a less negatie way! but i guess if your going to do that you have to be prepared for her response and id make sure whatever you say you back it up with possitive comments about her like tell her you love her and that you love the possitive things she says about you.

Once you get a therapist I would explain the situation and then make an appointment for a family session. It will probably be easier to confront her with the therapist present.
Don't attack her, but don't hold back either because if you depend on living with her you can't have this to continue.

I have had family sessions before, my mom was telling the therapist how my dad and I need to change. The therapist was trying to work things out. My mom thought I was trying to sabatage her and make her the "bad guy" when I am the one who needs help. She isn't in a place to be open to hearing how she can change. I have learned to accept that. There are some people who refuse to change and are in denial that they need to change. my mom is one of them. My dad is aware, but doesn't know what to do cuz he knows my mom and has talked with her about this, but she somehow gets him to appologize. It is sad, but true. I need to work on me. I can stay angry at the fact that she will not change, not now. Maybe in the future she will, it will take a miracle for that to happen. I need to give her to God and pray that He changes her heart. Till then, I need to work on me and how I can set boundaries and cope in a more positive way. My mom is an angry person inside, and she is also a counselor/therapist. She is one of those that believe that she doesn't need therapy. That is something I need to accept now. It is hard to do that all the time, cuz her words hurt. She doesn't define who I am. I won't and can't be who she expects me to me.

my mum used to be just the same, we clashed something chronic, but now as i'm getting older i am completely turning into her, i'm obsessed with cleanliness, and in my eyes sometimes its just not good enough, i think mum's do it when there is other stuff going on and they need something irrelevent to focus on, this is only my opinion, they will pick fault at little things because there is something underlying that they are feeling bad about, with me it takes my mind off of other things, if i get stuck into cleaning until the house is like a mirror it takes my mind off all the other rubbish that is going on, and gives me something to focus on, i said to my mum the other night, how she used to pick at little things, and i would interpret it as her being horrible, i know that with my mum now it was because of other issues, she's much more chilled now, she talks about what's on her mind and doesn't care what people think and is much more relaxed because of it, if anything she's now the person she should have always been, she still has her nit picking moments, but is so much better, i had years and years of costant clashes with my mum, so i know exactly what you mean, when i dyed my hair brown she told me i looked ugly and when i put on a bit of weight she was the first to point it out, she feels really bad about it now, i'm really honest with her now and tell her if she's out of order or has made me feel bad, and we have a much better relationship for it, it's uncomfortable at first and can make you feel like you're being an unreasonable child, but once you've said it all it makes you feel sooooooo much better

ur mom sounds just like mine. critical and that. she forever puts me down and gives me cruel remarks. i also am on disability and live at home. sometimes i think my mom cares but most of the time not. i cant say there is a way to deal with it exept just take it. its hard and my mom still shatteres my confidence but now i try to play her at her game though sometimes she ridicules me to the extend i have no reply, i just walk away, usually to my room or something.