I had my first therapy ever today. Ive never been to a therapist. So I didnt know what to expect. What was right or how I would know if we "clicked". I mean it seemed to me like she asked all the right questions, she knew what she was doing. But she talked kinda slow and in a depressing way. Also, I know its inevitable, but I cried. I HATE crying in front of anyone. I practically choke on myself trying so hard not to. I just wanted to run out and run away and just never stop. I want to run away from all of this, and leave it behind, it just keeps following me like a damn monkey on my back. I feel like I need to go run 5 miles just to work everything I ate off. Thats better than purging of course, and I would feel good about myself. I Just cant get my lazy ass up to do just that. I dont see how this could happen to anybody. Nobody should have to suffer this damn disease. If there is such a thing is God, why would he let this happen to anyone???
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