Eating Disorders Support Group
Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.
So, I have yet to eat today and it's going on 2 pm. I've only been up since 11 am so it's not that long but I know I should have eaten by now and I'm hungry. I just cannot bring myself to do it.
I think my reasoning for this makes me "eating disorder" not real. I do not think I am fat and need to lose weight. Now, I've gotten to that point, when my brain chemistry was out of whack. Anyone who starves themselves or is starved will start to think they are fat. There was a fascinating study done on it during WW 1 or 2 I believe.
I don't eat because of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). Eating is something that would be punished in various ways (rape, beatings, etc.) so when I get triggered, which depending o the time of year can be almost never or almost all the time, I don't eat a lot.
This time of year happens to be one of the worst times in regards to PTSD and likewise for the ED as well.
I don't even know why I wrote the above. I've just been having a hard day and posting a lot trying to get these thoughts out in the appropriate venues.
I think my reasoning for this makes me "eating disorder" not real. I do not think I am fat and need to lose weight. Now, I've gotten to that point, when my brain chemistry was out of whack. Anyone who starves themselves or is starved will start to think they are fat. There was a fascinating study done on it during WW 1 or 2 I believe.
I don't eat because of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). Eating is something that would be punished in various ways (rape, beatings, etc.) so when I get triggered, which depending o the time of year can be almost never or almost all the time, I don't eat a lot.
This time of year happens to be one of the worst times in regards to PTSD and likewise for the ED as well.
I don't even know why I wrote the above. I've just been having a hard day and posting a lot trying to get these thoughts out in the appropriate venues.
-
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
-
I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
i did manage to eat a little something though.
i did okay eating today. no where near enough but at least it was some.
thanks for the responses and the well wishes
It is true that your brain really gets confused after being starved of glucose. You tend to start seeing different things, and distorting your views.
Just keep on working on the PTSD and your ED with a therapist, and I'm sure things will get a little better. I know my flashbacks are becoming less and less as I talk to my therapist openly about the abuse.
/hugs
i'm on medicaid which no one takes in my county and i'm only on that for a few more months as i turn 21 soon.
everyone i have seen has basically told me they don't know how to deal with my past b/c of the level of severity.
maybe i just can't be helped. i've even had professionals (specialists in dealing with trauma) make awful comments such as "wow you're a world traveler, i'm impressed" and "i've never known anyone who saw someone killed before) i'm sorry, i don't consider being trafficked in prague a "world traveler" nor it is something to be impressed by nor is seeing someone being killed something to be awed by.
i just got the impression they never dealt with anyone like me and was impressed by me in some way. even the specialist haven't treated people like me.
i really should have been killed like planned.