lately iv noticed myself saying some weird things..like instead of thinking "im hungry" i think "my stomach needs food".. instead of saying "im cold" il say "my arms are cold" or "the rooms is cold".. its so weird.. or like instead of "im fat" its "my body has fat on it because i feed it too much".. i have so much trouble accepting the fact that my body is a part of me.. i look at it as a pet that i have to take care of or just keep alive basically.. i also cant stand being hugged touched or even looked at.. i cant bare someone looking at me:(.. its like im thinking "oh god theyre looking at IT" instead of "theyre looking at me".. i feel like im crazy.. anyone know why the f*** this is happening???:(
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??