I am sorry if I am triggering people, I don't mean to. To tell you the truth, I don't even know what triggers a trigger, I just know what it means to trigger. I do not believe I am being selfish, and I wish you would get to know me before passing judgement! I was under a man's thumb for many many years, and now I am free. Once I started eating again, since I don't have to be afraid of what he would do anymore, I have gained weight like crazy, and I don't understand why. It is like my body is storing everything I eat as fat. I have went from a size 5 to a size 11 in a couple of months. I have not believed until recently that I am anorexic. Looking at the things that I think later, after I have written them, I can't believe that is me, and I don't know what to do. I have tried professional help, but that was a big flop, and so I go it alone. I came here to get help. I put my feelings down in this group for the first time, and I am being crucified for it, rather than words of encouragement. It's like every one wants me to die. "Well, that's your choice." "You're selfish" I just needed some help in understanding why I feel the way I do. Is this thinking really bad? Am I really anorexic? I was just looking for help, and I am sorry I came here!
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