Ok, so if you've read any of my posts recently you know I'm a freshman in college. There are some fairly nice girls on my floor and I had lunch and dinner with them (8 of us in all) today. I have their numbers and such, so I'd say we are acquaintances. Anyway, it makes it so much harder. I feel so superficial and fake. Obviously, having friends without Eds makes behaviors harder to do (good, but also bad for stress). I am no longer the "crazy" one. Only one person here knows my past and we are both trying to be someone else. Thing is; I don't know how to not be the crazy one- the cutter, the anorexic, the emo...etc...I feel really lost right now. I have been going to different club type things; I feel empty. I've also been sleeping a lot. I guess it can all be depression......
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Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??