I would first commend you on wanting to get things under control. But I also know that it is easier said than done. I am struggling myself with getting my blood sugar levels under control, and have been doing so for 3 years now. However, I am finally on an insulin regimen that seems to be working toward that goal. I had to really buckle down and force myself to start testing regularly. What works for me is testing when I first wake up in the morning, right before I eat lunch and dinner, and then at bedtime. This may sound strange, but I bought a small black bag that holds my insulin, syringes, alcohol pads, test strips and meter, and glucose tablets. Having everything that I need in one place makes it easy for me to function, and keeps me focused as I keep that bag in plain sight at all times. It also makes it easy to function and travel as I just grab it and I know that everything that I need is in there. I hope this suggestion will help you some. My prayers are with you. Be strong, and know that you are not alone.

I agree with mevans. Keeping everything in one place is important.

I am curious about how you know how much insulin to take if you have not tested your blood sugar. Sometimes you can guess if you are high or low but that is usually only with extremes.

It is essential to take your blood sugar and to write it down so you can see patterns. Of course there are not always patterns to see, but if there are it is important to see them. I did not take a single blood sugar for years and was hopelessly out of control but now I am taking them. I have been told to take at least 4 each day at the times mevans said - before meals and before bed. Plus I take extra ones if I feel anything might be wrong or if I have done something unusual like going out for a meal.

I think it is just a matter of getting used to checking your sugars regularly. Maybe write notes and stick them up on the fridge or in the kitchen where you will see them before you eat. Set reminders on your phone. Get used to associating your food and insulin with a blood sugar reading. Try and find an education course, that was what worked for me, so I understood why it was so important to test so much.

But I realise that the troubled time you are going through tempts you to just ignore things and avoid taking a blood sugar in case it is high. It is hard but we all need to stop blaming ourselves for highs and lows because that will just make us feel bad and lead to avoiding testing. It is a very difficult thing that we are all doing, trying to achieve consciously something that most people's bodies do without a thought. We are never going to be 100%. It is always a struggle but the important thing is we are all doing our best and trying and facing our problems, or we would not be in a group like this. We should be proud of that.

You have to come up with a regimen that works best for you. I test constantly, almost obsessively. Thats not always tthe answer though. Sometimes I think it creates some problems for me. But keeping a log is good too. The minimed website has a sheet you can print that lets you actually graph it. I see how often I'm out of range really well with this sheet. Maybe talking to a therapist can help you come to terms a little easier. I've had treatments with a therapist in the past. But we can't obsess about the complications. It only makes it harder to "get a grip". And strees can sedn your bg up, up, up. So, the bottom line is that what works for one person may not always work for you. You have to do whats comfortable for you. Once you get a rythm going, it'll be like clockwork. ;)