I wish I had the guts to down all my pills. The only thing that stops me is the fact that if there's a hell I would definitely be going there if I did that. Otherwise I would. I'm so sick of feeling sick, of feeling like I want to die. I want it to go away and the only way I know how is to die. I can't take it anymore! I don't want any pity or anything, I just don't knwo how to express my feelings of not wanting to live anymore. I wish I could be happy, but I'm not. I try and try, but I just don't know how to acheive it.
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Please help, I have been suffering with anxiety and been depressed, I was steady as I had a good support system. I was in a realationship for two years but yesterday out of nowhere she broke up with me and now my main support system is gone. I have nobody to talk to (not even just about being anxious and all that, but nobody to talk to and no interactions.) It hurts emotionally and physically...
My form of self harm is picking at my skin. My fingers and chest especially at the moment look absolutely atrocious. Really worried people are going to notice and say something, and half the time I dont even realise I'm doing it. My skin was looking so healthy, and now I'm back to square 1. I know relapses will happen, but feel so angry and disappointed in myself.