I have used drugs to escape my problems for so long now they have become their own major problems.. I have been off effexor for a week now not by choice, i have been smoking like a maniac all week (no real change there) to escape my ever crumbling mind. I don't know what order im going to be able to handle sorting out the chemicals in my brain.. I don't know how to deal with problems when sober. When i say problems im not just talking about reasonable problems either, i totally lost my shit the other night because i discovered a fly on my burger when i got back from the bathroom. I had a great night at a party the other night until i left and realised i had no weed at home even though i wasn't sober. I need advise from people who have had major substance abuse problems. I have never had a problem with anything but weed (and alcohol when i try to quit smoking) but my weed addiction is so strong i can smoke just about anyone under the table no matter how experienced they are with drugs. I hate this chemical reliance but have no idea how to escape it. Im too afraid i will fuck myself up if left alone and sober with my thoughts. I'm too young and full of (suppressed) hope to be fucking my health and life up so badly.. I know there is a better life out there i just can't find my way.. Help me..?
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