Today was a better day. I still had to force myself to get up, this morning. But I did, and I'm glad. I've noticed, that my mood definitely improves when I get out of the house. The only problem with that is, getting up the motivation. Lately, getting dressed, and doing my hair and make up, seems like so much work. But I did it. I went out with my friend this morning. We got coffee, then got our eyebrows waxed, then did a little shopping. I bought myself, a new pair of sunglasses, some earrings, and new pillows. It felt good to buy myself some nice things, as well as, things that I needed. I did start getting anxious in one of the stores we went in though. I got hot and lightheaded. I began pacing the floor as my friend was paying for her things. We were gonna hit one more store, but I told my friend that I had to go sit in the car. She understood, so we left. I definitely wasn't expecting anxiety to hit me. I'm always fine when I go out with this particular friend, because she looks out for me and she has social anxiety, so she often avoids crowds. I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder, but crowds definitely trigger the attacks. The store we were in, was almost empty though, so I'm not convinced that this came from my surroundings. I think it was from the Starbucks. I don't really drink much caffeine anymore, but I love Starbucks, even though I usually regret drinking it, later on. Other than that, today was a pretty good day. I know there are more bad days ahead, because I'm still fighting, what seems like a never ending battle. But days, like today, are what make me realize that I'm still capable of having good days and like the depression and anxiety haven't won, and that's what makes me want to keep fighting.
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