I'm struggling and I hate it. I hate this feeling that I'm holding myself back. I'm wanting to succeed in things and flourish and grow but I can't help but feel that I am holding myself back. Part of the reason isn't even my fault. My immune system isn't that great and I get sick a lot. I also have chronic migraines and I'll get one out of nowhere. Other days, my depression and anxiety will wash over me like a tidal wave and I drown in my own thoughts and feelings.
However, I think that part of me, a really insecure part of me, doesn't want to succeed. I'm scared of being successful and having people expect so much of me and then dissapointing everyone when I am unable to meet their expectations. I want to make others happy and meet their expectations but I have this feeling that I'm not good enough and will never meet anyone's expectations. I try so hard to tell myself that I don't need to meet everyone's expectations and that I am good enough but there is that small voice in my head that tells me otherwise. I hate that I am my own worst enemy.
Im so lonely, please help. Please
I recently completed a series of ketamine infusions. I felt pretty good for a couple of weeks. I'm back to feeling pretty lousy and so I feel like I've wasted time and money. I'm not happy in my relationship and living situation and I've been looking for a place to go. I feel guilty for doing this and not telling him about it. I've not been particularly happy at work but today my boss...