I'm falling into the black hole. I cannot deal with the fact that my husband just walked away almost 3 months ago. I don't want to be alone, I am terrified of the future. Every solicitors letter and divorce paper knocks me closer to the edge. I feel as if my life, my future has been ripped away from me without so much as a conversation. I feel as if I am a total burden on my beautiful, kind daughter who is trying so hard to help me even though she is heartbroken herself. I have to admit I have thought it might be better for everyone, including me, if I were not here. I'm trying to fight the feeling but at the moment I so want the pain to stop and keep thinking about suicide. I am so ashamed of this - millions of people get divorced, why can't I just cope with it?
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It has been over a full decade since I trod these halls. I remember leaving after going through a very dark place (no not Wales) following the passing of a father I didn't even know. I always intended to come back, but the longer it went, the more difficult it felt. The feeling that I may have abandoned those I cared for made it intolerable.Even though I remember so many names: Mike, Katie,...
things are so bad now. i am too sick to even type. i need help so bad. i can't get the help i need.