Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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Setting limits

deleted_user
deleted_user
On my DS friends is struggling this week with setting limits with someone who is abusive in her life. She hasn't given me permission to mention her specifically.

If you have a success story of reducing or limiting the impact of a family member, a partner or spouse, a loved one, a friend, etc. please share.
deleted_user
deleted_user
There have been many in my life who abused the power they thought they had over me. All I can say is this..I was treated badly by my ex and well, he is gone. I am married to a great guy now and have a nice family. Had I have stuck it out with him I never would have found happiness. This holds for even family members. We can only be controlled and hurt as long as we tolerate it.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Stopping them outright is a good idea. What if they are a family member, a parent, a sibling, etc.? Would you still use the same approach? (I think I would -- I have).
starfish
starfish
One of the best self-help books I've read by far, and actually was effective, is a book called "Boundaries" by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend.
It comes with a workbook if you want to use it, to get the most out of it.

It helps you know when to say 'yes' when to say 'no' and how and why to do it.
psyc
psyc
my whole family.I dissown them for about 2 years because of the pain they were causing me.I come from a very large family.I have 10 sisters and 5 brothers.my mom passed away about 12yrs ago.so we only had our dad left.my one sister was the voice of the rest and wrote me aletter telling me to leave my dad alone and if I didnt they were going to fight to take my kids away because they didnt think I could financially take care of them.that was only one of the things they did to me.they were also calling me everyday leaving messages on the phone telling me how worthless I was.this has been going on my whole life.Im the black sheep of the family.when my mother died they told me I couldnt touch my mother because I was unworthy to.please believe me this was very hard for me because my mother was the only one who protected me from my siblings.My therapist convinced me to have no contact with them so I could heal andget strong.it was just under 2 years before I had contact with any of them .and it was the best thing I ever did.now I have a good relationship with only a couple of them.There is alot of lost trust though.I dont know if I will ever trust them again but at least they know they cant hurt me anymore.
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