I have been here before. In the place right before I take the big fall into major disfunctional depression. I havent been able to get to sleep in 3 days. I see my doc in a week and a half but what until then? And itisnt like he can help me either. The last 3 drugs I have tried have damaged my health in such a way that I have had to come off them. Theyhave left me worse than I was before. I havent cut in forever. By that I mean YEARS. But it seemed so apealing before I came to my senses and got on line for support. I feel like I have lost myself. On top of tht I seem to keep getting kicked while I am down. If someone in my life is going to be an ass couldnt they wait for me to be at my best so I am in a place to cope with them? I suppose I should know that isnt how life works.I have been self medicating in a disfunctional way the past four days. But I have to get through this some how. When your doc and everyone else cant help shouldnt you do what it takes to keep fighting even if it is something your not proud of?
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