Since I've had my baby I've had horrible thoughts. They come into my mind at random times, usually at night or when I'm on my way to work. I imagine horrible things happening to my baby and me being helpless or my baby being kidnapped and hurt in front of me. Recently I have been thinking about him growing up and committing suicide and me being at the funeral crying over his casket and picturing his smiling face as a baby, and all the years gone by. I'm crying right now as I type this. I feel like I can't get a hold of these horrible thoughts. My doctor put me on zoloft but it hasn't helped. Every day I think of these things. I'm 29, i just had a baby he is 4 months old. I have always thought these things, mostly car accidents in my family, me getting a horrible phone call, the funeral...i play out the entire scenerio. Please help me, I feel like I'm going crazy.
Posts You May Be Interested In
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...