how do you all handle flashbacks? some years back my then boyfriend was in a terrible car accident - in a coma for 2 months, in and out of hospitals and rehabs for a year, paralyzed from the neck down. i was still attending college full time and working when this happened. daily trips to shock trauma really did a number on me. eventually his family came to me and told me that if i couldn't handle being a "girlfriend" anymore that would be okay. i was 20 - quit my job so his parents could pay me to take care of him once he was allowed to come home. it was too much. i had to stop. i have been carrying this guilt with me ever since. i found another boyfriend (who is wonderful btw) and that makes for more guilt. i stopped coming by everyday to see him - more guilt. then i moved a little further away and i haven't talked to him - i am embarrassed to say - in QUITE some time. MORE GUILT. anytime someone isn't wearing their seatbelt i have these flashbacks. when i walked into the hospital when both my sisters gave birth - more flashbacks. i just cry and cry when it happens. i bottled everything up in those moments. when my family would ask how he was doing - i gave his status - when asked how i was doing - i was okay. but i wasn't. and now when i have these flashbacks i don't know how to deal with them so i bottle them up and try to make myself forget. i don't want to forget - but i don't want to feel guilty either. how do i deal?
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