I only find one reason to keep on living... and that is so I do not cause my family immense pain. I find no reason to live for myself. I thought was going to kill myself today. I prepared everything. Deleted every personal trace on my computer. I then curled up next to my cat on my bed and tried to say goodbye... but couldn't. Instead I just cried for an hour and fell asleep from the exhaustion. I still am unsure if I am going to find this reason to live. It seems so unfair that I should be stuck here with no will to live. I guess another day passes. The battle seems so worthless.
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