tonight i'm supposed to be getting out of the house for the first time by myself. the thing is i'm getting a little nervous and feeling uneasy about this whole thing. maybe its not such a good idea. i'm thinking about what if there is alot of people there which it probably will be on a friday night. what if i get there and can't find a place to sit and have to stand the whole time or even worse what if i get a table but its a big table and i have to sit at an empty table all alone. then i start thinking about what if people try to talk to me and ask me questions and i have to tell them im there alone that will be so embarrassing to me. i really need some encouraging right now. i already bought a nice outfit yesterday to wear to this thing so thats an indication that i really wanted to go and was looking forward to it. now it just seems like maybe it won't be so fun after all. i have like 2 hours to make a decision about whether or not i want to go
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