Well I just got done with my second visit with my new therapist and she said she does not think she can help me. It seemed at our first session that she did'nt seem too interested or could help me. I told her about the depression, suicidal thoughts, confusion etc. but she/we had a hard time pinning down how to fix the problem. I told her that I trusted her as a professional to find at least one or two areas, or even finding a total solution to my depression. When one wants to kill themselves, the act of walking in that door is a step in the right direction. As hard a step as it is to take. When its a deadend, it makes life even harder to handle. At this point in time, I don't really know where my head is at. This is not like a broken foot. Am I crazy?, am I going to do something bad? who knows. Our mind controls or can cloud everything. She said she may be able to find someone else. I fear that won't work either. Its summer now which is a good thing but if I don't turn things around this coming fall, I think things may turn out bad for me. I am very lost and depressed. Sometimes I think some of us fall into a catagory of people that just cannot be helped and however good or tragic we turn out, that is just the way it was supposed be.
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