i have had 2 awful nites -- i go to bed around midnite then start crying when i try to sleep -- i try not to think bout anything but that doesnt work -- soon i start thinking bout mom and its usually the good memories... its memories like when she would talk to me and console me if i was feeling bad or she would give that "motherly hug" or remembering her smile and then i lose it. i pull the sheets up over my head and cry like the world is coming to an end. I do this for as long as 2 hours almost every nite -- i cant take much more. More than anything i want one of those "motherly hugs" or anyone at all to hold me as i cry -- i forced myself last nite to stop crying and i did for bout 10 mins then everything poured out -- i cried myself to sleep....now i have a constant pounding headache...i just need to let it out
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