i am about to whine--i dont know what i need but i need something. i am having really intense but fleeting thoughts of killing myself. i was out shopping and all i could think about was running out into the street into traffic. i am not home but all i can think about is how badly i want to get home and just be done with things. i have things setup so that when i want to follow through with my plans, i can do that from home. i have a crap load of things that i have to get done over the next few days and cant really be in this state and get them done. i just need some type of something so that i can chill out and get stuff done. i called the hotline thingy and did not get much help there. i need to buy some time and i think that i am going to lose it sooner rather than later. any advice out there for me.
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