I use to be so happy before everything went wrong. I won't bore you with the details but I can't seem to get my happiness back. I am full of self-doubt and shame, which makes me feel worthless. I know before when I was happy. Yes I had not dealt with my childhood trauma but a least I could pretend to happy. Now, I am sure I am not loveable, everybody hates me and I should give up on school for I am not smart enough and I don't deserve to be there. My self doubt and miserable thinking is eating up all my time and it may lead me to failing out of graduate school. Yes, I know that school is not everything but sadly it is all I got. I do not have social life, my parents have been dead for 20 plus years and the small remainder of my family are so far away, plus they have thier own issues. I am isolating myself from what support I have and I am really scared.
Posts You May Be Interested In
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...