im not sure how he will react, but i know with myself i always wanted someone to talk to me.sorry my advice isnt better

I feel he really wants me to help him but, he doesn't know how to ask this time.

I think you should make the first step and TRY to reach him. You know your son better than anyone, and if you think he wants help then he probably does x It cant hurt to try x

I am fighting a real battle with my depression right now and the best thing for me when I get this way is talking to my mother, unfortantly she lives to far for me to go to but she is always there for me I can open up to her and she doesn't judge me. I have delt with doctors and mental hospitols for 20+ years and I feel trapped and confined and not the personal touch I am looking for. basicly I guess is to try and get him to open up to you, just let him know your there day and night. but if you feel his life is in danger then don't wait get him help.

If it were my son, I would be up front about my concerns.
I would start by telling him how much I love him, and ask
how I can help him. SUch as:
Is there anything I can do to help you right now? Is there anything that would make you feel better? Will
you call me if you need anything? Etc.

I'm with everyone else on the advice to talk to him. Maybe the meds are too expensive or he ran out and didn't refill (I'm really bad about that -the refill bit) or maybe the meds the doc. put him on made him feel weird and he just hasn't been up to the task of going back to the doctor. You could help him with any of those things or just listen to him -sounds like he can open up to you since he's done it before. Good luck!

My advice may be a bit late but i suggest you hold him. I know from experience when i refused help from doctors and others, all i really wanted was a hug. I wanted someone to hold me and tell me that i can trust them. They will be there for me. To support me through this. If he hear's that maybe that will give him hope to take his medication, and talk to someone about whatever it is he is going through.
I hope this helps in addition to the other replys.
Peace

go to him, he needs you, and you will be glad you did...

I agree with everyone else

Yes, go to him. Have you already? I hope so. Can you remember something about him from the past that was neat - like if he was one who liked camping in the mountains, but he doesn't any more... your words might be well-received if you are more inspirational than critical: "I miss the old you who liked to camp in the mountains. That's why I want you to get some help, so that you can be the YOU that enjoys life again."

You need to stay on top of him in a very supported way. Yes, go to him. He allowed you to help him before. There could be all kinds of reasons why he isn't taking his medication. My son sufferes depression also and I felt like I wanted to turn into a magnet and stick to him but I had to give him space. Kept keeping an eye on him and when I did ask him questions he didn't shut down. He actually talked to me. I had to encourage my son to talk about "anything" that isn't going well with him to the doctor. I experienced bad doctors and left for new ones. I put that in his head too, that if ever he felt this doctor isn't caring about what you care about, find one who does. Lots of things can go funky with taking medications. If it is not agreeing with him, he should talk to the doctor about switching it. Also a clue, my doctor told me with depression that runs in the family; a medication that works well for the parent can also be the medication that will work well for the child. Turns out my son is now on the medication I am taking and doing well. All this because I want to comunicate everything I experience in my life the hard way. I don't want it for my kids.

The medical is only one side of depression. Unless you know what he is depressed about, you could make things worse.

forcing someone to do something that they are not willing or ready to do can even make things worse.

You can always extend the offer of help and wait until he is ready to accept it.

I think your instincts are telling you what to do. tell him your they for him, that you will listen and that if he is not ready to go to the doctors yet, when he is and if he wants you there, you will be there. dont worry to much about doing it a bit wrong that fact that you are doing something will mean everything.x

Please,get him to the dr. or to a hospital. I say this because of his drinking on top of taking Valium, he could die doing this. Don't try to talk him out of this right now. He needs medical and psychiatric intervention now.Also, the fact that he is not staying on his meds needs to be addressed by a therapist.

let him know u love him stay as close and loving as u can. my son died i miss him every day i hadn't talked to him for months, don't let this happen to ur son LOVE HIM NO MATTER WHAT.