i've decided what i am going to do. on friday, im gonna call my own bluff. i keep thinking and whining about how i want to die. well on friday im going to give myself a fighting chance to take my own life. if i really want to die, ill do it. if i am just bluffing which i think is the case, ill punk out and then i will have to stop telling myself to do this because then we will know that this is not what we want and we will have to agree to do what is best to get over ourself.
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