I am blessed with a beautiful wonderful 3 month old baby boy. He's the one joy in my life. I am worried that depression runs in the family and it is genetic on my boyfriends side ( he is the father). I worry a lot that one day my son will experience depression. I never want him to feel the agony and my pain that both my boyfriend and I are experiencing. I'm working hard to change my life and get better so my son isn't around the chaos and poison of my depression. I don't want him to see me go in and out of hospitals. I want my boyfriend to get a better handle on his depression but I know I have no control over that. I know that if my son has the misfortune of getting this disease I and my boyfriend will understand and be able to be more supportive and help him. I hope. I still would rather pour gasoline on myself lite myself on fire and jump into a pool of acid before I ever have my son feel such pain such torment. It really worries me and saddens me. I just wanted to share that.
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