Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

16,048 Members
156,664 Posts
11 Online
Mental Health
/ Depression Support Group

MEN!!!! Ugh!!!

BeckyK
BeckyK
Ok for those who are sensitive, you might not want to read this.

Why when I call all he can ask is if I want to have phone sex? I don't want to have phone sex! I said I am not comfortable talking like that! He says "Why? It is not like I have never seen you naked or we haven't ever had sex." I said we just do it we don't sit around and talk about it! I think he got a clue that I wasn't in to it but geez!

He keeps asking me if I would ever or have ever cheated on him. He say he just needs to hear it. Makes him feel good to hear me say that I would never and have never cheated on him. WHY DOES HE NEED TO HEAR IT ON A WEEKLY BASIS??? Is there something I should know? I asked him the same question, and he just said that he is very proud of the fact that he has never cheated.

I don't get him! Doesn't he know me by now? I mean we have been togather for 11 years, and married for 7 (as of August of this year) of those years! It is not like this is the first time we have had this conversation! I HATE TO TALK ABOUT SEX! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE PHONE SEX! Ugh, get a clue!

Sorry just needed to vent.
deleted_user
deleted_user
It's our male insecurities, and ego. We need constant reassurance that we are all thing's to our woman. Just be patient with him
BeckyK
BeckyK
Thanks slowride. Love your name by the way! LOL

I just am tired of telling him everytime I turn around! It is not like I have time to even think about anybody else! He calls me 20 times a day! Not to mention I am busy with two young boys! I don't go anywhere other than my parents, the neighbors, and the grocery storel, with my boys!!! Frustrating!
deleted_user
deleted_user
he's to insecure. Sounds like he doesn't trust you
deleted_user
deleted_user
I agree; he IS insecure. But he may have a guilty consience, as well, which would feed his insecurity.
deleted_user
deleted_user
i was going to say controlling. He HAS to have you available, he wants to isolate you from your family, he has a need to always make you wrong and him right. I am really surprised he hasn't hit you. He souds as if he is getting worse maybe? Has he always been this way?
deleted_user
deleted_user
hi becky,
i am glad that slowride gave you his input good to have a mans view,
he does sound quite insecure..and i know that you have tried to get him to understand and trust,so i dont know.
but we are here anytime you want to sound off lol

hugs hon
joyce
deleted_user
deleted_user
Becky, I'm with Star on this one. It isn't just the phone calls, it's the sum total of all of the parts that makes me so concerned for you. As far as the phone sex calls, next time he asks, just tell him "no means no" and leave it at that...not a lot of room for interpretation there. Big hugs sweetie...meems
deleted_user
deleted_user
I know what you mean Becky. My husband can be that way too sometimes. I, too am very faithful and loyal. We've been married 5 years. I get so angry at these stupid questions. Now when he bugs me about it I won't answer him. i dosen't like that but I don't care. I know this is his own insecurties and I have been very patient with him like slowride said but at some point it is just plain immature to keep harping on us. Like Get a grip already. Anyway, I can relate.I know my husband loves me. I'm sure you husband loves you too. But the never ending accusations get very tiring.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Let me give you another man's opinion. He sounds like an ass. Period.
BeckyK
BeckyK
I think he is insecure, and maybe has had an afair. Don't know.
deleted_user
deleted_user
With all due respect, ya'll are reading to much into it. Most of us men are that shallow, insecure, egocentric, and "dumb" - so to speak. You could lie to him the next time he wants to have phone sex, and move on...lol
barbra2
barbra2
Hi Becky, you know me and this topic....he has cheated, been there, heard that, and his guilty conscience is speaking now...phone sex? Tell him to call one of those hot chat lines and leave you be!!!
deleted_user
deleted_user
maybe that's how you are as a man slowride but i'm not
barbra2
barbra2
with all due respect slowride, Becky's husband is playing with her and there is a long story behind these words....we know what we are talking about...and lying is not the answer, and Becky is not a liar by no means..her husband is. Although it is nice to have a man's opinion in here...how would you feel if your wife or other lied to you about something important!!!
deleted_user
deleted_user
yeap, it is mean. Some of us are a bit more aggressive, and we need that reassurance from our women. Some men don't need the extra petting, which is good for them.
Posts You May Be Interested In
  • joannklingaman

    Grief

    Posted by: joannklingaman
    Last Reply: MrsMorris
    10
    A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
  • ainteasybeineazy

    It's my Birthday and no one cares

    Posted by: ainteasybeineazy
    Last Reply: karendee
    42
    Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...