
Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

deleted_user
i dont know why but sometimes i get overwhelming feelings of insecurity and paranoia, but only when i'm about to go out in the evening with my boyfriend. we are in a very secure and loving relationship and he is always telling me how i am the only one for him.. we are very much in love and i trust him with all my heart.. but i get so paranoid over the littlest thing, i feel so hurt and so so small and i wished i didn't. all i can think about is something silly like "well he probably wishes he was with someone else anyway" that kind of stuff.. no matter what he says, when i get into that mode i can't get out of it for ages.. it usually ends up in an argument by the end of the night. i hate it. why why why?? :(
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It can be hard to trust, even when the person is trustworthy. The emotions you're feeling are coming from you, I think, and not him. You're not feeling lovable and worthy, so you may be looking for evidence to confirm that.
But your boyfriend is there b/c he WANTS to be. That's the bottom line. (And isn't that a nice bottom line? If he also has a nice bottom, then you're doubly blessed! *laugh*)
I don't think you can get over those feelings without lots of work (but it'd be worth it -- I'm finally doing better with blocking out those thoughts and I'm infinitely happier). You might want to consider doing a little research on cognitive therapy (a way to retrain the way your mind thinks).
From all your posts, you sound smart and wonderful, and you're gorgeous and stylish to boot. We just need to get you to see that reality, in your heart of hearts.
Best,
Lisa
After beating the hell out of one of the doors in the house and screaming at the top of my lungs I thought of you guys and calmed down (someone sent me a hug and it was very much needed), then started to think about WHY I was so upset. She tells me she loves me. She still comes home to me...so what is it about her going out that bothers me so much? The answer was actually quite simple: she leaves me here by myself with nobody to talk to, or do something with, and I'm tired of watching the same movies over and over again. All my friends live 5 hours away (I moved here for work and met my wife) and so when she goes out, I have nobody to spend time with...and it makes me feel like I'm not worth spending time with. I don't know if that means I've made any kind of breakthrough, since I still feel like hell, but at least I have some idea of WHY I feel so bad. I know I should make some friends and get out of the house but this town is so small and it seems so much harder to find people with similar interests here. I'll think on this some more and see what I come up with. Anyway, sorry for ranting on about my own problems, this was supposed to be a reply to Emble's post.
Emble, I understand how you feel. I don't know what to say other than your boyfriend is telling you he loves you. I think the both of us, and anyone else that feels these insecurities should try to work on giving them the benfit of doubt and take them at their words until they (if ever) prove their words are lies.