I have been in denial for a long time now about my depression. I guess the reason being is because it is not the type where I feel like its the end of the world, or that I just want to die. But I am just not happy. No matter how hard I try, I just don't feel happy. Here lately, I have been having problems with energy. I just dont want to do anything anymore. No matter how hard I try, I dont have it in me to accomplish anything. I use to love to workout, but when I do go to the gym it was just about a worthless trip. I sleep all the time, and I dont want to do any hobbies that I use to enjoy. I cant even gather the energy to clean my house. I look around and go flop in my lazy boy and pass out. I didnt understand this for a long time and was beginning to wonder if something was really wrong with me health wise. But then I got to thinking when my friend said all she did was sleep and her doctor diagnosed her with depression, that maybe, just maybe I am really depressed. The problem being, I dont want to take medication for it. I am not happy, but I am not to a point where I feel so unbalanced that I need to be medicated. I just dont know how else to get out of this funk. I, at first, thought maybe it was situational depression, but things have really been looking up for me now, and there isnt a reason to still feel lousy. I have a great job, and was pursueing a dream, have good friends and family to support me even though I havent let them. I just wonder if there are other ways to feel better with out medication. I know it's not my mind set because I want to be happy, I want to have energy and do the things I love, and I am not looking in the wrong places for my happiness and I am still attempting to do those things I love. I really just dont have the energy. How do I get that energy back? How do I get my smile and happy go lucky personality back? I miss those, and I dont want to feel like I have to turn to a pill to get that. I guess it would have to be a chemical imbalance, or hormone imbalance... but I really can't stress enough that I would love for this to go away with out pills. Does anyone have any suggestions or ideas of how to cope with this?
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