Hi Lizzy, My heart goes out to you. I'm so sorry for your pain. You're not alone in wanting to die. I'm so sorry you're missing your mom. My mom died 28 years ago and I still miss her. Keep posting and reaching out here in DS there are a lot of wonderful understanding people here.

Lizzy, please talk to me!!! Please don't hurt yourself! Suicide is never the answer! You have your whole life ahead of you! Shake those looser off you, and look deap in your hear and find what you are really passionate about and don't let anyone stop you. You are a beautiful talented young woman who has her whole life ahead of her. Find something you love to do and go for it! I have faith in you, you can do it!!!!!

Hugs, BeckyK

I know how wanting to die feels like. Cry all you need to, take a walk, do whatever you think will make you feel at least a little relieved at the moment. that helped me

i know how bad it gets sometimes izzy.but just remember that there are people that love you and they would be devastated if you took your life.talk to someone,a close friend a family member or maybe a priest.you will get through this.

My father completed suicide when I was 14 years old. I found him. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't long for him. My deapest wish is to hear his voice just one more time. I know you have a lot of pain. I can hear it in your words. My father died because he had a disease. It is called Depression. Help is out there. Ask for it.

I was feeling that same way myself just a couple of days ago. I didn't think I would make it through the pain. I probably wouldn't have if it hadn't been for the people here at DS. It's very hard when the one person you would go to and talk things over with is gone. Talk it through here. Suicide is a very permanent solution to problems that are temporary(even though they don't feel temporary). I know that being dead is not the answer. But sometimes the pain, no, the despair is so overwhelming you can't feel anything except the want for a peaceful existence and that is death. Actually, what we really want is no more pain. I have learned, like you just did, that asking for help right away when that happens is the best thing. Talk it out here. Scream it out here. Cry it out here. Lean your head on someone shoulder right in here. We really do understand the frustration and the loss. Come sit down right here on my lap. Let me wrap you in my Mommy's quilt. Put your head on my shoulder. Just cry. Let it all out. Yell, scream, swear, talk, or just cry, it's okay and it's safe here. Shhhhhhhhhhhh, we are all right here for you. I'll just rock you a bit here while you let it all out.

I bet what you want to die is your pain.
My mother lives one hour away and she is bi- polar without treatment. I cant talk to her about anything of consequence.
I have found subsitution, like you would in a tribe. Someone is meant to be your spiritual mother or father and they will be there for you when you need them like your mother was. Be open to different ways of meeting and connecting with different kinds of people. I have asked 2 of my girlfriends mothers if the would adopt me and both did (cuz I'm an armful!) You are never alone in this kind of pain. Many of us know it well. We all send you hugs and prayers dear one.

Hi Lizzy,

I am so sorry for your pain. Feeling like you want to die is something you are not alone in. But remember...the ones who love you will miss you. It is a very permanent solution. 2 of my uncles committed suicide...I miss them everyday. I had times when I thought that was the answer to my problems. I am glad I didn't. I took walks...drove around with the music blaring...went to the local animal shelter and petted the animals. The coffee shop with a good romance. Anything to get your mind off your problems.
Please hang in there....we are all here for you.

Hi Lizzy--Ending your life is not the answer....really. Talk to your mom through God. I talk to my dad through God all the time.

God Bless You!!!

I am in the same situation as you. I always feel like I want to die too. Maybe you could talk to me if you wanted to. There's not much I can do, but I damn sure will listen and tell you what I know.

What do we do when we get these terrible thoughts? How do we dispel them?

For me I try to replace them with thoughts of God and all the blessings He has given me, including this gift we call depression. Please read my journal post for more on that subject.

And we have so many folks here at DS who love and care for us.

Lizzy - please don't hurt yourself. You are a valuable human being with much to contribute. I know you are really hurting right now but please keep posting here at ds. We will get you through this. :-)

What otterheart said is SO wise. I think when we get feeling so low, it's the PAIN we wish would die. Don't you just want to be happy and without pain? Isn't that the real wish?
And the part about finding a tribe is right-on. Keep looking for people and experiences (safe ones!) whose shoulders you can lean on and whose wisdom you can trust. Nothing will replace your mother, but your needs will not go away just because she's no longer there.
Please don't give up.

I can't remember a single day that I haven't seriously contemplated suicide. I have attempted it 3 times and no one knows... until now. The funny (or maybe not so funny) thing is that I was angry that I didn't succeed. Right now the only thing that is keeping me alive is that I am waiting for a settlement. I plan to take that money and tell everyone that I am moving out of state. I would never call and never come back. They wouldn't know. I would rather them hate me for not keeping in touch than have to deal with my suicide.

Lizzy, we are all here for you! Please try to talk to a therapist or a hotline...sometimes talking to someone face to face makes a big difference!::::::hugs:::::you still got so much of your life ahead of you! please dont do anything until you can talk to someone face to face!