I turned 51 years old on July 27. I had set a goal to be dead before that day arrived. But, with meds and a new found friend that was a lot of support, I was starting to feel better about life. Now I feel I am losing that friend that means so much to me. I feel like hell. I am beginning to with I had made that goal. Just dont want to be here anymore. Cant say I am really feeling suicidal like before. I just want to lay down and never get up again. Saddest part is that I dont feel like I want any support or help. Just want to be left alone. Dont want to be here any more.
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