About two years ago I lost everything I had given myself to...the church I grew up with became too enthralled in rules and regulations in so much that permission from the minister was required to fellowship with my friend...soon I was discouraged and I slowly became isolated from everyone I knew. At one time I had dreamt of becoming a missionary but lost faith not only in God but in myself...then I lost a husband of almost 11 years to adultery and my world has never been the same...I no longer have the will to keep on going and I am merely existing...I feel numb to eveything and everyone...I think almost daily what death might mean to me and have many thoughts about ending my life...I tell myself that what I've gone through is nothing compared to others and I feel ashamed of what I've become...but I feel I'm losing in the midst of my chaos and that it's no use to call out for help...but I'm pleading, for the sake of others, for help...would someone care to reach out to me when I have no answers and only questions plague my mind?
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Today I wen to the park with my sister Alex. She brought her puppy and her toddler. While walking her puppy kept lunging and barking at people, walking behind the stroller and getting me tangled with my own dog. I kindly told Alex she needs to train him to walk on a leash. She said she knows. Then I suggested a puppy training clas and she got really defensive! She said she isn't going to be in a...
I don't know what to do I've always been bad at communicating with people but now it's just gotten worse I keep on making people angry with me and it upsets me because I feel bad and it makes me upset that people are mad at me I don't know what to do I'm trying I really am but I don't know what to do anymore I just wanna make people proud of me instead of disappointed