I am too tired to do this life alone. Oh yeah I'm told I have people who care. I have an excellent job I've waited to have for years, a vocation I've wanted for years all of my life really, have beautiful kids I am so proud of, but I am alone. I am tired of being alone. God gives me everything but what I need most and that is companionship. I am supposed to be okay with being alone, having no one to talk to, digging and begging for people to talk to when I want to die, like now. oh I'd "hurt so many people" if I died now. I don't want to die, but I can't live with no one regardless of all the other things I have. If I don't have love and companionship and have to feel this agony by myself, I can't do it anymore. My whole guts hurt so bad. God seems to give me everything but what I ask for and need most then he and everyone else tells me I'm sposed to be okay with that. I am not. I'm me. I need what i need not what you need. I can't endure this pain I've endured for so long. I am young but too tired of the pain.. I really need outta here or to have my fkn needs met. Let me outta here.
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