so im feeling really stupid right now. after my last post about shopping sprees i got to thinking about bipolar, like- yeah, i've spent at least 50 bucks or more everyday for the past few weeks, and i used to tlose touch with reality and do some stupid crap like drink too much, smoke pot, complete change of who i am- sometimes i'd even stay up until the wee hours of the morning painting or something cos i couldn't sleep. so anyways, i immediately and frantically called my pdoc and said, "i have to see you very soon" my appt. was only a week away, and i felt like i couldn't even wait that long. so i'm seeing him first thing tomorrow, but i feel stupid. like, this definately could have waited. i'm so stupid! i really wish i didn't geek out like that. i hope he doesn't get pissed off at me. everyone already thinks i'm a nutbag. last weekend i embarrassed myself in front of all my inlaws. i was so irritable and acting like a total b*tch, then later i had to apologize for making everyone uncomfortable. my husband told them all i was just crazy and not to take it personally.
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