Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I have been having a rough couple of days and the boards have gotten me out of myself by helping others and joking around. Right now I am in physical and emotional pain both. For the physical pain I can stay seated or lay down but cannot walk upright nor without cane. I have been depressed and unable to care for myself for a long time. This week I have not bathed, the best i could muster today was washing my face, brushing my hair and teeth. My back is out and my arms hurt too, the weather has been damp. The left sciatica is acting out again.
What I did not expect was to be totally ignored by my husband. He is at work several days in a row and then home for a few days. He just left again this am. yesterday he was so oblivious to my condition, he usually helps me to get washed etc. and at five he asked if i wanted to go out to eat. He was oblivious that I had barely been out of bed, and I was so unkempt. All I eat or make is frozen food lately. It's all I can manage along with sandwiches. I am so depressed and I feel guilty about asking for help here (it seems that very few answer my journals) cause I see what can happen. But I am hiding, behind my positive thinking, helpful links, and trying to help others.
I am feeling both angry at my husband, guilty about being ill, and guilty about even posting while others seem to be suicidal, I am in pain, but not suicidal. My problems seem less pressing than others. It's frightening letting you know where I am at, but tonight's the worst in a long long time. I felt so invisible to my husband and I feel invisible here. I would love to go out to eat a real meal I would love to be noticed more by my husband who does do all the chores, but this time he was oblivious to me and we hardly talked. I confronted him and he did call me when he got to work. He never calls me from work during the day, just at night when he's done. He's denied I need an aide or someone to help clean, he doesn't want people here. I am isolated and have a hard time getting out though I do drive. I am exhausted from being like this. I really need some support. I stopped smoking in July thru DS support and detoxed from my psych meds which had made me feel like a zombie, now I feel everything and am being maintained on 10 mg of paxil and valium and today and yesterday I needed the morphine which is prn.
Ambien prn too. I am weary from this whole experience.
What I did not expect was to be totally ignored by my husband. He is at work several days in a row and then home for a few days. He just left again this am. yesterday he was so oblivious to my condition, he usually helps me to get washed etc. and at five he asked if i wanted to go out to eat. He was oblivious that I had barely been out of bed, and I was so unkempt. All I eat or make is frozen food lately. It's all I can manage along with sandwiches. I am so depressed and I feel guilty about asking for help here (it seems that very few answer my journals) cause I see what can happen. But I am hiding, behind my positive thinking, helpful links, and trying to help others.
I am feeling both angry at my husband, guilty about being ill, and guilty about even posting while others seem to be suicidal, I am in pain, but not suicidal. My problems seem less pressing than others. It's frightening letting you know where I am at, but tonight's the worst in a long long time. I felt so invisible to my husband and I feel invisible here. I would love to go out to eat a real meal I would love to be noticed more by my husband who does do all the chores, but this time he was oblivious to me and we hardly talked. I confronted him and he did call me when he got to work. He never calls me from work during the day, just at night when he's done. He's denied I need an aide or someone to help clean, he doesn't want people here. I am isolated and have a hard time getting out though I do drive. I am exhausted from being like this. I really need some support. I stopped smoking in July thru DS support and detoxed from my psych meds which had made me feel like a zombie, now I feel everything and am being maintained on 10 mg of paxil and valium and today and yesterday I needed the morphine which is prn.
Ambien prn too. I am weary from this whole experience.
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
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I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
first of all, please don't ever feel that u r any less important than anyone else here on DS; if u ever need to chat, i am here! i can feel your hurt through your thread. please talk to me if you'd like!
now, i am sorry that you feel so badly. i wish i could offer some advice...my suggestion is to talk to your husband very calmly about why you are upset and explain that you need his help. My hubby gets frustrated with my issues sometimes and then he shuts down on me-not an excuse, but it does happen once in awhile.
Try to do something nice for yourself, anything that would make you feel better.
Thinking of you :)
I can imagine a little of your agony as I spent this past spring rolling on wheels, eating muscle relaxers, etc. just trying to halt back spasms. Now I'm to the point where I only need a cane first thing in the morning.
You don't have to hide in your pain here. This board is for all of us, you can post anything anytime you want.