I don't know what I need anymore. I don't know if I want to get better anymore. I am a very impatient person, so when all the therapists I've tried to contact don't return my calls or say they will be free in 2 months, I lose it! I need help now and can't seem to get it. If I don't get it now, I will do something bad. I have no hope left. This is now almost a full 24 hours feeling like this. This means it will not go away for a while. I don't know what to do anymore. All I want to do is drive my car off a cliff so I don't have to think, I don't have to live, and I don't have to be disappointed by people. I'm tired of hurting. yes, it is a selfish suicidal day...and I don't care. It's horrible
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