I have not been on the site for quite a while because my depression has been under control and I have been feeling great. Last Thursday, I lost my dream job. This makes the 5th time I have been downsized since 1991. I am 61 and should be planning for retirement (big laugh) instead of having to start another job search in a screwed up economy. At first, I thought I was going to be OK but, today, I have been losing it pretty bad. I keep thinking about going out in the garage, closing the door and running the engine until I don't have to worry any more. Everything seems so useless - why even try - I can't buy a break. I can't believe how quickly I have fallen back into that old familiar pit of depression. I can't bear the thought of starting over again - why try.
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