what a couple of weeks i have had. my husband has proved to me that he doesnt care a bit about me. he isnt even speaking to me now either. he is turning round and using things friends of mine have said against me. so i feel all alone now. i have no one who gives a shit about me. why do i carry on. i have to cos i have my daughter to take care of. and if i dont do that she will turn on me too. she has already told me. so i have no friends. i found out yesterday that my best friend got married in secret.she was uspposed to get married on august 8th. but they went and did it with their families on thursday. and this woman has been my friend since i was 12, i thought she was my best friend but i guess thats not so. i never got to go to her first wedding, and i was looking forward to seeing her getting married next month.i thought she was my best friend but i guess not. then on july 18th was my birthday and my husband couldnt even get the family, his family together to take me out to dinner. that would have been nice, but no its ok for everyone else to have it done for them but not me. then july 25th was our wedding anniversary. i spent hours making a card for hm. and he wouldnt even open it. he finally did open it on saturday. i have no friends. i left the usa to come back to england to be with him. and all we do is argue. i am so fed up. i hate the atmosphere here, but i cant leave cos i would loose my half of teh prrofit. so herei m stuck. my mum never calls me, my dad only calls if he doesnt hear from me in a week. why am i such a bad person that no one wants to be in my life? and every one is so mean to me. yesterday my husband said that once the house is sold, he will be living in a total mess, with no where to live. but his sisters house is empty and he has lived there in the past. and i am sure she will let him live there again. but me, i dont know where i will end up. on the streets i think, with my dog. i cant see any other place i could go. my dad says i cant move in with them. my mum lives in the middle of no where and my step dad wouldnt let me live there anyway.my husband is nice to me infront of other people but when we are alone after company have left he turns nasty on me again, so they think he is so nice to me and why am i complaining. they dont see the man i see there. he goes fishing on sundays , fishes in a match, but there wasnt one last week but he still went, so my thinking is why did he go fishing when he could have spent some time at home with me. unless he is out with another woman. i dont know. he has to sell his dream car cos he cant afford to run it. i told him i wanted $4500 for it, but he thinks he has it sold for for a grand less. he is looking for another car, he found one that we both like. and of course he has to keep me sweet on that, cos i bought his car for him. cos we needed one, and i will be paying for this one too. and he wants to pay off his bills with the rest of the money left over. my money again. i said no way. its my money i will keep it. he wants to spend it. so this year has been the worse year of my life so far. i sit here and cry all day long. and that gets up his nose too. oh yeah lay on the water works why dont you. he is causing all sorts of problems between me and some friends.i dont know how much longer i can take it. the only person that loves me unconditionally is my dog, bubba. he loves me. but i can honestly see me and the dog living on the streets. cos shelters wont take dogs and he isnt going to take my dog from me. i am thinking of packing up my things this week, he is working nights for the next 7 nights. so i get some peace from him then. he is always going on at me to get a job, and i sit here all day long looking for a job and applying. i cant help it that they dont want me. all he wants me for is my money, well there isnt much of that left either as he has spent most of it. i did have $5,000 about a year ago. but not any more. he just uses it. i have had to bail him out of trouble many times at the bank. he says to every one he is trying to keep this house going and he cant, but i give him money every week, and i have always given him money when he has needed it.he says i havent given him a penny, but he knows that isnt right. so my question to you is what do i do ?
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