I have learned the hard way to keep my distance from my neighbors, especially the ones with kids. I am nice to them, but talk to them and see them only maybe once or twice a year.

She sounds like she thinks she is better than you. I would keep my distance as much as possible. You don't deserve to be treated like this. It's hard with neighbors. Good luck!

ummmm... not trying to be insensitive or anything... but isn't that just a part of having kids?? i mean, for sure, she should keep her kid on a leash if she can't behave, but i'm sure she didn't mean anything wrong about it... and as far as typing that shit, nice of you, for sure, to do it, but don't let it become a habit, for sure. you're a neighbor, not a doormat.

I am not sure there is a lot you can do now that the incident has ended (so, to speak). However, if they came again, in front of the mother, to the daughter I would say something like this.

"I am happy to have you here to play and such, however, last time we forgot to tell you about our "playover" rule. When we have someone over to play, they must respect our home rules, (say them--like no jumping on the bed, etc.) and they must help clean-up from the playtime BEFORE mom can take you home." LOOK at the mom shaking your head yes, and say, "right mom?"

And then I would say her name, and ask her if she understands and say, "otherwise we have to wait a while before we can have another play time. Then I would tell the mom to call 30 minutes before she gets there so you can get the kids to clean up.

Now you've set it up, so when the mom comes, if the little girl misbehaved or did not help clean up, you can tell the mom in front of the little girl.

Because I have been burned so much--I do the same thing everytime a child comes over for an extended time, or I share it with the mom over the phone so she can share it with the child ahead of time.

And if it is severe enough I do share challenges that we had with the child...open communication is the only way to go.

I guess I wouldn't have watched it in the first place. I'm not a kid person. But since this is hypothetical...
I'd be pretty upset, but then again, thats because I don't really like kids all that much, esp ones that misbehave. which are most. which is why I don't like them. Okay, I'm being cynical, but in all seriousness, it sounds pretty rude. But what are you gonna do, except just not do her anymore favors. seems its all you can do.

(thinking) I cannot write short responses...

i agree with you mego...seems like people agree to do things they really don't want to do and then act like they feel "used" later. maybe you just need to put some boundaries in place to protect yourself. If you don't wanna do something, just say no. and if that person gets offended....tough. you gotta stop people from putting their crap on you...or they'll be standing in line to do it.

Well, I guess, I am going to combine two responses...

1. Keep distance and
2. if she asks for one more playdate or sitting-- I'll tell exactly what Sighin Tampa suggested.

thanks guys.