I've gotten to the point where I honestly don't know how to make friends, or at least get close to them. For a while I used my depression to make people feel sorry for me. I was so low I felt that was the only way people would like me was if they felt sorry for me. By doing this I accually managed to push all my friends away because all I ever did was whine. Now I've gotten to the point where I don't trust myself to open up because I'm afraid of doing it for the wrong reasons. Now I have no idea what the right reasons are. So theres this guy that I want to be able to open up to and I don't know if I want that for the right reasons. Is it wrong to want to open up to someone just to get closer to them or is that the right reason? I feel like so many things that have happened to me have made it impossible to have a relationship, maybe I'm just really afraid of getting hurt again. All I know is that I can't keep living like I am right now, shut off from the whole world. So is it ok to try and open up to aomeone and ask for help?
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