Ok so even though I got a job in construction getting paid 8.00/hr, I am even more miserable. I need somebody to make me do something that I fear more than anything...I have got to go to the hospital. I fear it so bad, but if I am still having issues even though things are a lot better, and it seems worse, then I am not able to do this alone. I am so worried about tomorrow, I'm sick. I hate waking up so early...I am always in a bad mood...I need help. The feeling of wanting to die is solid now...it has gotten harder for me even though it's really gotten better...what is wrong with me?
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