Try not to participate in the mud slinging; it sounds like you don't really want to, so simply step out of it. Try going to an AA or ALANON (Alcoholics Anonymous or AdultChildren of Alcoholics) meeting to get some perspective on what the alcoholics are doing to your family. There are some things you can't change. Try repeating this serenity prayer to yourself:

Grant me the serenity to accept
The things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdon to know the difference.

Hugs...

Thanks ToddyJean. I grew up in Maine. I keep the serenity prayer in my wallet.
I haven't slung any mud, but I'm included in other people's mud. It's a mess.

You can't expect any better with two active alcoholics. Just write them off. They don't know what they say or do.

Don't get caught in the middle. I used to do that at home with my family. I was always trying to make things better. It does not work.

You may want to try Alanon based on the 12 steps of AA. My husband went and found it really helpful. You know you can't change them. You can only change yourself.

I say all this to you with love and caring for what you are going through. They are suggestions and you decide what's good for you and ignore the rest.
Love
Claire

Your welcome in my hole. I generally climb in it around November and cme out again mid January :)

Thats what Holidays are all about too much food drink then a good old scrape the pond bottom family row. Family are like fish after three days both should be thrown out.

Thank you for the replies. It's just so discouraging that we can never seem to be nice to each other. So tiring.