I have been trying really hard to share but nothing seems to come out. How do you share the bottom? Nobody wants to go down there to get you or even visit. I feel guilty for staying here but no matter how hard or want to move I can't get myself out of the house. Even small goals are unreachable. No medicine seems to help. Except for my wife who has her own problems, though she tries, can't break through. I'm afraid she'll get tired of being around me. She says she won't but down here nothing seems sure. By the time words reach me they're distorted and all I hear is rejection. I've had 2 failed back surgeries and shoulder surgery. I have severe neuropathy and back pain that sometime makes doing the slightest thing unbearable. I'm stuck that's just it. I'm stuck and while everyone may say the only way is up the hole just doesn't even seem big enough to hold half of me. Sorry to be such a downer.
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